Husbands are to be phased out and replaced with Benedict Cumberatches made out of chocolate, according to an official report.
Shoppers queued out of the doors at the Westgate shopping centre, and over three thousand chocolate husbands were pre-ordered. The woman pictured bought one for her daughter as well. She said:
“Well, they’re just a lot less hassle really aren’t they. And he’s very handsome. And he’s made of chocolate! I can’t wait to get him home & nibble him all over,”
The solid chocolate effigies of Benedict Cumberbatch are less noisy and smelly than real men, do not fart in bed and make ideal companions for busy women.
The divorcee that created the original chocolate Benedict Cumberbatch claims that they are eleven million times less irritating than real men when you’ve got PMS.
“Let’s face it. Most of us want to poke our husbands in the eye at least once a month. But imagine if your husband not only didn’t do or say anything stupid to upset you…But he was actually made out of melted Galaxy bars AND he looked like Benedict Cumberbatch. It’s so simple, I can’t believe nobody has thought of this before,”
The Beezly Street Gazette 
Leave a Reply